The Road Forward.
Find your purpose without losing sight of the past.
What is moving forward after loss? Now, I want to be clear: moving forward doesn't mean you've "gotten over it." The reality is, you never truly get over losing someone you love. But the question many people wrestle with is, how do you move forward without leaving your loved one or your grief behind?
It's a complex dance between allowing grief its rightful place and also finding the room to step forward into what life still has to offer you. While the concept may seem easy to understand, its actual execution can be complicated and often benefits from a structured approach.
The Power of a Future Destination
In her book, Resilient Grieving, Dr. Hone talks about the importance of having a future destination. Having something to aim for gives you an anchor, a reason to wake up each morning. However, having a future destination doesn't mean you’re done grieving. Instead, it serves as a way to honor it.
By giving yourself something to work toward, you allow grief the space to continue to reveal itself in your life, even as you're making strides forward. This is where having a guiding hand, such as a grief coach, can be priceless in helping you chart your path more effectively.
Crafting Your Legacy
What could this future destination look like for you? Here are some ideas…
Starting a non-profit to support causes that were important to your loved one.
Creating a scholarship in their name.
Writing a memoir or series of essays to capture their impact on your life.
Developing a community program that commemorates their life.
Creating a work of art, like a painting, sculpture, or song, that captures their essence.
Planting a tree or creating a garden as a living tribute.
Curating a photo or video tribute that can be shared during anniversaries or family gatherings.
If you know you want to do something, but all this seems like too much to handle right now, that's totally okay. A grief coach can help you figure things out step by step.
Lasting Connections and a Renewed Sense of Purpose
The goal here isn't to replace the person you've lost but to create an extension of their life—a legacy. By building something meaningful, you strengthen your eternal connection with them and give fresh life to your sense of purpose. What could be more purposeful than creating something that adds value to others and stands as a monument to someone you've loved?
Start Small, Dream Big
Making big plans feels overwhelming. Especially if you're still in the early stages of grieving. You can start with small actions like writing down your feelings, spending time outside, or engaging in small acts of kindness in memory of your loved one. Even these simple acts can help you heal and make plans for bigger things down the line.
As those bigger things begin to develop, setting aside time each week to work on your "future destination" project is a step in the right direction. Coaching can also help you identify actionable steps that pave the way for your larger goals.
Grief as an Opportunity
Grief is undeniably painful, but also offers a rare opportunity to redefine your life's direction. Grief isn't just about 'coping' but about transforming, growing, and learning how to carry your loss in a way that enriches your existence and those around you.
If you find the idea of future destinations compelling and want to make it a reality, consider the tailored support that grief coaching can offer. My newsletter goes out each week to dive deeper into areas like this, providing you with practical tools, fresh perspectives, and heartfelt wisdom you won't find anywhere else.
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Let's navigate this maze together, forging new paths while honoring those we've lost.
Sending you love & light,
🤍 Lauren
